Respect for women begins at home

It is common knowledge that women shudder to venture out after dark in many Indian cities even during emergencies. Many of them have to suffer the dirty looks, abusive comments and groping hands of men while traveling in public transport almost daily. Perhaps the New Delhi rape case brought out the fight in women and their fathers, brothers and husbands to seek justice and end it all.

But the problem in India, as in other parts of the world, is not only with rape and evident violence against women. The problem is with people's mindset, and it starts at home.

The preference for sons over daughters, neglect of the girl child and female feticide (although it is banned) is where the problem starts. Boys growing up in most households realize very early the power they wield over their parents and, therefore, society irrespective of whether their family is rich or poor, educated or illiterate, powerful or weak. This instills in them a sense of false importance about their gender.

But as they grow up and venture into the wider world, this false importance becomes part of their psyche as they see male dominance everywhere, from academics and jobs to law enforcement and politics.

But India is not the only country that suffers from this social malaise. Perhaps no country is free of it. China, too, has its gender problems. The preference for sons, the declining man-woman ratio, the bias against women in certain jobs, the preference for "beautiful" rather than qualified, intelligent and efficient women in certain professions, and domestic violence against women all add up to China's gender problems. And despite rape not being as rampant in China as in some other countries, it is not an unheard of phenomenon.

The problem in China is then not very dissimilar to that in India. India's National Crime Record Bureau's figures for 2011 show that as many as 94 percent of the rapes were committed by people who were known to the victims. Surprisingly, 8.1 percent of the 94 percent perpetrators were close family members or other relatives, and 34.7 percent were neighbors and community members.

The accused in the New Delhi rape case were strangers to the victim, so better police patrolling and vigil (as many of the protesters demanded) will not solve even half the problem.

Of course, women need better social and legal protection. But that has to start at home in the way we bring up our children, in the education that schools and colleges impart, in the way husbands behave with their wives, in the way fathers treat their daughters. The greater part of the responsibility, however surprising it may seem, lies with women because they have to teach their sons to not see and treat women as objects. This is as true for India as it is for China.

The author is a senior editor with China Daily.

Email: oprana@hotmail.com

(China Daily 01/11/2013 page9)

 

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