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Modern woman's dilemma: career or family?

By Yu Ran and Wang Ying | Shanghai Star | Updated: 2014-08-14 09:39

At the end of 2010, Tencent and Wuhan-based newspaper Changjiang Daily surveyed over 20,000 women across China about family and work commitments.

Modern woman's dilemma: career or family?

Chongqingtakes spin at silent square dancing 

Modern woman's dilemma: career or family?

Making the crucial transition

About 40 percent of women polled said they wanted to be full-time housewives, while 38 percent are more committed to their jobs. The rest were still making up their minds.

Contrast this with another survey by the Shanghai Women’s Federation conducted nine years ago in 2005, where only 10 percent of 1,000 respondents were actively looking to leave their job without a back-up plan.

The change may be the result of more pressure at work and heavier responsibilities at home, and the difficulty of striking a workable balance between the two.

Being a full-time wife and mother is a sometimes thankless job.

The Chinese family exerts tremendous pressure on the primary woman of the house, and she is expected to oversee myriad duties. These range from basic housekeeping to the children’s education to important family decisions to caring for the elderly at home.

“I am on crisis management mode almost all the time, handling unexpected tasks without any breaks, in between cleaning and cooking, taking care of my child and both of our parents if they are sick,” says Chen Mi, who gave up her job three years ago when her son was born.

Since then, Chen hasn’t had a chance to have dinner with her friends as she has to cook for the family and be with her son until he falls asleep every day.

“I am working like a robot in the role of housekeeper, mother, wife and nurse at home. I get little chance to interact with other people. I feel abandoned by society,” Chen says.

To add to such feelings of frustration, full-time housewives also suffer the stigma of being regarded less capable than those with a career outside the home.

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