High-speed living in a parallel universe

In my next life I want to be a bullet train.

An intrepid Agence France-Presse reporter in New York had snaffled a celebrity interview - a world exclusive, I suppose - and huge swaths of humanity, including the lucky readers of this newspaper, were let in on the results of this grand investigative undertaking on Friday. The understated headline said it all: "Yoko Ono wants to be sparrow if reborn."

"Well, who doesn't?" I asked myself.