Season hasn't started, but is Arsenal done?

The cliches are lining up like Carlos Tevez and Mario Balotelli waiting for a cross.

A game of two halves, (Olympic scorecard flashes up, 2/10), a game of two teams, (disqualification), a game of two goals (3/10), a game of two weather fronts (4/10) and for the going-for-gold-attempt, an Olympic stadium on the night of the opening ceremony (a world record in suggestive writing).

OK, the opening ceremony was on another continent, but this was the Bird's Nest, and the Games were opening.

To football fans, the Olympics provide an opportunity to enjoy sporting endeavors without getting too worked up. Synchronized swimming will never inspire thousands to roar in unison, though on the evidence presented on Friday night, neither will the way a certain team from North London played.