Magical mystery tour of fish oil, jade combs and ...

"Remember ladies and gentlemen, that the skin is the first line of defense against disease," says the persuasive speaker at our local neighborhood center.

"Our product not only fortifies the skin, but also hydrates it and penetrates deep down to the basal layers! And just for this special tour, I promise you, if you purchase three tubes of our Pearl Beauty Cream, you will get a packet of this ground pearl powder for free! It is excellent to use as a facial mask and made purely of natural agents so you can even eat it.

"What's more, it will make your skin firm and ravishing!" she squawks enthusiastically at a 70-year-old man seated in the front row. You have to wonder if a man his age is thinking of his youthful skin, or even of the pearl necklaces on offer in the shop she leads us into after her robust talk.