My unwitting debut on Chinese reality TV

What is it about newcomers in a foreign land?

There I was, feeling quite settled after a few days in Beijing, with my spacious apartment, high-speed Internet, new cellphone and local bank account.

I'd certainly hit the ground running. My belongings were duly organized around the apartment (or as organized as they were ever going to be), the table was set up with laptop for the Net, I was already loading the phone with my new contacts and arranged for my wages to be credited to my bank account.