Global village

Playing chicken

J. Gordon-Ewing has four languages under his belt and thought picking up Chinese would be straightforward. But his experience in a Shanghai hotel made him realize his shortcomings.

"Ordering room service was sort of like playing a game of darts blindfolded," Gordon-Ewing writes on shanghaiexpat.com "After an interesting mishap with jellyfish smothered in something green, I begged the English-speaking concierge to please order some soup for me and have it sent to the room.

"He recommended the chicken soup. I was thrilled! I sat down, put the spoon into the bowl and the only chicken that surfaced... boney, scaly poultry feet. I'm from Colorado, and I know where chicken feet have stood. I've observed the beasts standing in their own excrement despite having several acres of free range to roam on. I realized that it was time to find English-speaking people and Western food before I starved to death."

Straight shooters

The guys from the Beijing International Darts League meet every Thursday night at Beijing's popular Goose and Duck bar. Club president Richard Babara, 43, is an old China hand who has been living in China for almost half his life. The Ugandan dart enthusiast says players are both Chinese and foreigners, and there is healthy competition every week. He says darts are not an event in the Olympics, but still, he will support Beijing Olympics with all his heart.

Weekend scream for Halloween

The Halloween party weekend is a big event for many expats, because nothing beats a fun, fancy dress party. Last year, doctors and nurses were popular costume themes, and Harry Potter types were waving their wands. However, the costumes which turn most heads and startled a few security guards were those of the SWAT team garb, complete with plastic machine guns. These funsters even had the proper helmets.

AND ANOTHER THING...

Driving on China's super busy road system takes serious focus and a lot of patience. It also takes a driver's license. Although the Chinese drivers' license test is conducted in English and is very helpful in explaining local road rules, some expats pay "consultants" to do it for them. One consultant promises: "You neither personally learn the driving knowledge, nor take examination; you only provide us photograph of your original driving license, the first page of your passport and your China visa, as well as your six photographs. We will have your Chinese license issued in a month."

The cost varies between 2,000 to 4,000 yuan ($267-534). However, the real 45-minute test costs about 100 yuan ($13). Sitting the test is not only cheaper, but it helps new drivers learn important road rules. It also may help save their life on the chaotic road system.

(China Daily 10/26/2007 page20)