It can pay to have presents of mind

How to give gifts and influence people 礼物 (Lǐwù)

China has always been known as a land of ceremonies, one that is focused on reciprocity. Whether it be visits by heads of state, diplomats, business people or people generally, Chinese often express their affection and gratitude by giving gifts to one another.

Among business contacts, a timely and appropriate present can quickly bring them closer together. So, how do you select and send a present?

First, the value of the present should be appropriate. Recipients of cheap gifts with little thought behind them are likely to find them condescending; recipients of gifts that are too expensive may feel under pressure, making it difficult for them to accept the gift.

For those taking gifts to colleagues and contacts overseas, the best presents may be those from their own countries; such as souvenirs representing hometowns, companies or universities, and with a delicate package this would be a good option.

There is an old Chinese saying: 千里送鹅毛，礼轻情意重 (The present itself may be as light as a goose feather but sent afar it conveys deep feeling.) Such a gift expresses this sentiment exactly.

Second, present the gift at an appropriate time. On the first business visit, during holidays or festivals, on special anniversary events, when celebrating successful collaboration, or when your departure is imminent, all are good times to send presents.

Third, pay attention to local customs and taboos. In China, people usually do not give梨lí (pears) as presents, because the pronunciation of the wordd coincides with the character 离lí, which means separation. In 苹果 píngguǒ (apple) 苹is a homophone of 平, which means safety, and stands for safe and sound in most areas of China, but in Shanghai dialect but its pronunciation coincides with 病故bìnggù, die of an illness), so you need to consider this.

Chinese like good things to be in pairs, so usually prefer even numbers of items. If you send flowers it is best if you send an even number. However, there are some exceptions to this rule; although the figure 四 (four) is an even number, its pronunciation coincides with that of the character 死 sǐ, (death), so Chinese usually do not like this number to appear as a room number or mobile phone number (especially not ending with 4).

When considering the color of the gift’s package, Chinese usually prefer bright colour like red, gold or yellow, whereas white and black should be avoided as they are not as auspicious as red and gold.

And you cannot send a green hat or turban to a Chinese man as a present, because it is a symbol of being a cuckold. It is also considered taboo to give a clock as a gift; the Chinese expression 送钟 sòng zhōng (to give a clock) sounds exactly the same as another Chinese expression 送终 sòng zhōng (to attend a dying person or to watch someone dying, and although these two terms are written differently, it really does not sound auspicious.

Usually when Chinese people receive a present, they do not open it immediately. This is the Chinese way of showing respect.

Next week: Dinner

This article, the third in a series, is based on a lesson provided by the Business Confucius Institute at the University of Leeds. To find out more, go to http://lubswww.leeds.ac.uk/confucius/home/

(China Daily Africa Weekly 08/08/2014 page27)