I'm learning British English here in Beijing
By Renee Haines (China Daily)
Updated: 2010-08-31 11:18
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When I moved from the United States to Beijing last year, I thought I would learn Chinese. Instead, I find that my Chinese friends are teaching me English, as in British English, which makes them semi-trilingual, having mastered Mandarin, American English and British English.
"Brilliant," a Briton might say. "Cool," I say.
I suspect Britons have an easier time understanding us than we do the language of Shakespeare, Monty Python and Hugh Grant. That's because American English is such a plainspoken dialect, which is probably why it's the international language of business and the Internet. K-I-S-S, the four letters some of my former instructors and editors used to write on my reports to encourage me to be plainspoken, stood for "keep it simple, stupid".
Our everyday conversations are plainspoken, too. For example, when something doesn't go well, an American will say: "That sucks!" But I was told by a co-worker from England once that a Briton would say, "It's looking pretty grim." British English sounds prettier, I'll admit, but Americans do have a knack for getting to the point.
Our dictionaries are different. We abide by Webster's, and Britons abide by Oxford. Talk to me about a flat, and I'll offer you a lift. But my trilingual Chinese friends inform me that flat means apartment (not a flat tire) and lift means an elevator (not a ride to a local garage to fix your car's flat tire). Aha! It's not about cars, but about buildings.
Lorries are trucks? I thought they were hats, or maybe parakeets. Q is a word that doesn't have anything to do with a James Bond movie. While it's pronounced Q, it's spelled queue (I think) and means (I hope) to stand in a line (I'm pretty sure).
My favorite is the British word for umbrella: Brolly. The first time I was asked if I had a brolly, I really did think it meant did I have a black eye from a brawl, as in brawl-eye but maybe pronounced brolly by someone from, say, the countryside in England. (I was just guessing.) In fact, right now my Microsoft spell check function is redlining the word brolly to signal that, hey, that's not a word. But it is, and I have since heard it several times when it's raining outside in Beijing.
Pissed is another Let's-Stump-The-American word. In British English, that means getting drunk. In American English, it means getting mad. "Did you get pissed this weekend?" a Briton will ask. "What was there to get pissed about? I had a great time drinking with my friends," I respond.
Cheers, we'll say when raising a beer mug at a bar. Cheers, Britons will say when they mean thank you or goodbye - and I don't know what else (I am still learning). I suppose it's the UK version of the word dude, which can mean anything, too. As in: Dude. (Translation: Hello). Dude? (New surfboard?) Dude! (Yes, I'm proud to say.) Du-ude! (Way cool, dude!)
I also learned from my Chinese friends that weekend and university are not the names of nightclubs. So when something happens "at weekend" or "at university", it means during the weekend or at a university. This all goes to show how easy it is to play Let's-Stump-The-American.
As in, "Do you want to use my torch?" In the US, that means a flammable material wrapped around the end of a stick of wood, which you then ignite. You don't see torches in the US, except in old black-and-white movies about angry 19th century European villagers carrying torches to chase a werewolf or Frankenstein through the woods at night. So, I start backing away very carefully from the person who's offering me a torch until my smarter Chinese friends explain that, in British English, a torch is a flashlight. Whew!
I listen. I take notes. And one day I'll remember that, duh, I must ask them how to speak Chinese, too.
