Pair of gay lovers advertise for two lesbian
By Yang Lifei (Shanghai Daily)
Updated: 2005-12-06 09:33

A pair of closeted gay lovers have posted an online advertisement looking for two lesbian women to marry them so that they don't have to put up with questions from their parents about when they will find a nice girl and settle down.

One of the men, who only identified himself to reporters by the pseudonym Zhou Xiaotian, said they had met two sets of lesbian partners since posting the ad in October, but neither pair were suitable for marriage.

Zhou and his lover, identified by the pseudonym Liu Gang, refused to talk to reporters yesterday, saying they were worried about being publicly outed after speaking to a reporter from the Youth Daily earlier this week.

Zhou, 27, told the Youth Daily he came up with the idea to advertise for lesbian girlfriends after his parents repeatedly set him up on dates with girls and pushed him to get married soon.

"We don't mean to hurt others and just hope to overcome the present stress by this means," Zhou said, adding that only lesbians would be able to fully understand their situation.

He stressed the ideal lesbian pair should have a strong relationship with each other and be a good match for Zhou and Liu in terms of appearance and personality.

Zhou met Liu, 23, in an online chat room four years ago when Liu was a university freshman. After chatting online for six months, the two men became lovers.

Liu, who lives in an unidentified city, has graduated from university and found a decent job.

"Both our parents are traditional minded and expect us to get married and have babies," Liu told the newspaper. "We could neither accept their demands nor tell them the truth."

Sun Zhongxin, a sociology professor at Fudan University, said parents should be tolerant toward gay children.

"Children's happiness should be the No. 1 concern, not whether they get married or who they are married to," Sun said.

If Zhou and Liu choose to conceal their orientation and marry straight women, more people will be hurt, she added. Others are less accepting of the idea, however.

"Even if they get married, their parents would continue to urge them to have children, which can be another problem," said Steven Gu, a volunteer with the Chi Heng Foundation — a Hong Kong-based non-governmental organization mainly engaged in AIDS related projects.

If their marriage goes wrong, more headaches such as getting divorced and dividing property would be created, he said.

Gu suggested the best solution was to communicate with the gay men's parents and ask for their agreement.