Time to evict the renter

The story remains the same, only the names of the heartbroken have changed. "Lee" and "May" have been dating for more than five years. Theirs is a comfortable relationship. Familiar routines, shared friends, even perhaps, rent or a mortgage split two ways. But what is not on the table is marriage. Sure, there have been times when the subject is broached, but mixed in with forthright declarations of love are justifications for delay and conversational detours that steer the issue back to its usual cul-de-sac. Nevertheless, time waits for no man or woman, and as she calculates the years left on her biological clock, waves of anxiety begin to rock the boat.

Then there it is. The Ultimatum. One of them (it's usually him) balks and she's soon packing up the dishes, microwave, linens, mattress and sofa while he crams the X-Box into a backpack and hops into a cab; only to resurface a year later on Facebook with photos of himself and his new bride sipping cappuccino at a Parisian sidewalk cafe, trs chic! Meanwhile, back at the studio sublet; her prime years lost to that dead-end renter, she's left tilling a barren field sprinkled with aging Lotharios and serial husbands, looking for wife number five. And while revenge fantasies may give her some solace in the first few months, wouldn't it be better to know how to spot a "renter" versus a "buyer" in the first place?

Surveys show that the majority of men decide within a few dates whether the woman they're dating has the makings of a potential wife. The shortcoming of this is he'll usually not let on to the woman his musings. So, if you're traveling on the "Will you marry me" expressway, the bended knee and the ring will be stops along the way. However, if you're on the "I love you - but " pot-hole-ridden county lane, put it into high gear and take the first exit on the right. Still, how do I know which side of the white picket fence I'm on, you ask?